First dates are a learning experience: There is a lot you don’t know about your potential partner, so you’ll need to ask a few first date questions to bridge the gap.
Need to ask open-ended questions to allow your potential partner to express their true, authentic self. It’s a good way to get a sense of who the person really is. Basically, if you’re trying to truly connect with your date, asking questions without making it seem like an interrogation is the way to go.
Below we list 50 questions you can ask on a 1st date. Thank me later.
If you’re nervous about how to start asking questions on your date, Tracy recommends starting with some softball questions. For example, hit them with some easy ice breakers that can relieve any anxiety.
- What made you want to go on this date?
- Who’s your closest friend and why?
- Would you rather spend a night in with your partner or go out in a large group?
- What’s one of your favorite childhood memories?
- Why did you decide to move to this city or town?
It can be boring to only talk about work on a date. That said, a person’s job does take up a large part of their life, so it’s no surprise that you’re going to have to ask them about their occupation to learn more about them.
You want make sure this part of the convo doesn’t become a snooze fest? Get creative and ask questions like ‘who do you hang out with most at work?’ or ‘what’s next for you in your career?'” This keeps things light so the date doesn’t seem like a job interview.
- Where do you work?
- How long have you been in this profession?
- Who do you hang out with most at work?
- What do you love most about your job?
- What do you like the least about your job?
When it comes to personality-based qs, recommend you ask him/her about *situations*. This way, you get a chance to see how they might react in certain positive, negative, or neutral scenarios, which may reveal more about who they are than asking them point-blank.
- Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
- Are you an early riser or a night owl?
- What does an ideal weekend look like for you?
- What’s your favorite way to relax?
- How often do you like to exercise?
Okay, so family can be a sore subject depending on the person’s relationships. Still, if family is super important to you, you’ll want to get some background on how they interact with theirs, how close they are, and so on. If you’re worried about bringing it up, before you ask, you might want to confirm that it’s okay to talk about their family circle.
- Do you have any siblings?
- How close are you to your siblings?
- Who were you raised by?
- Are you close to your parents?
- What’s it like being around your parents?
Questions About Values
It’s hard to avoid topics like religion and politics right now. It’s more acceptable to talk about those things on a first date. Concerned about bringing up a touchy subject? Ask them if it’s cool to talk values before you dive right in.
- What’s your political affiliation?
- Who do you plan to vote for in the next election?
- Has your political affiliation changed?
- What’s the social issue you’re most passionate about?
- What was your life like during the COVID-19 quarantine?
Questions About Passions and Hobbies
Hobbies show their personality, extracurriculars, and values in life. And if your hobbies align (maybe you both like to read!), there’s a chance you can do them together.
- What do you do in your spare time?
- What are your hobbies?
- What is the hobby you’ve been doing for the longest period of time?
- What’s a recent hobby that you’ve picked up?
- How often do you read?
If you know what hasn’t worked in past relationships, then odds are you’ll be able to spot those red flags in this relationship too. You can mold the information that you gather from the first date to determine whether you want a second one.
- What are you looking for in a relationship?
- What does your ideal partner look like?
- What do you like most about relationships?
- What’s the best part of dating you?
- How do you cope with loneliness?
Questions About Future Plans
A lot of the tougher questions with hard-to-crack answers come when you ask about future plans. If you aren’t on the same page, it could signal some issues in the long-term.
- What are you looking for in a serious relationship?
- How worried are you about the future?
- Where do you want to be in five years?
- What about the future excites you most?
- What about the future concerns you most?
Sex! There’s no doubt that this can be an awkward subject. But if the date has been going well, you can consider bringing up a more ~sensual~ topic.
Before asking something potentially uncomf, read the room and ask yourself if you’re in the right headspace to give answers too.
- How would you describe your sexual orientation?
- How would you describe your tastes in the bedroom?
- What do you look for in a sexual partner?
- How do you define the word ‘sex’?
- When was the first time you had sex?
Now It’s Your Turn
So you’ve asked your date a bunch of questions. One way to take the heat off of them is to turn your qs inward. Start posing inquiries that have to do with what they think of *you*. It will give them a chance to flirt with you (hi, compliments!) while also making sure the conversation is not all about them.
- What was your first impression of me?
- What stood out about my dating profile?
- What kind of friends do you think I have?
- What do you think my parents are like?
- Why did you decide to go on a date with me?